Scene: Queen Vee stops at the organic market (yes I'm one of those people. I've seen one too many documentaries on the way our food is prepared and am freaked out enough to bleed more money for the ancient way of growing food. Naturally.) on her way home from work. She waits at the deli counter for her half pound of honey turkey as a male walks up. She instantly turns 13.
QV: oooo he's cute! he's tall! i love his yellow t-shirt, how cute! he's cute! i should say something! say something! ooo he has a nice body too.
(looks away, a little surprised that she actually noticed his body)
Second Deli Counter Guy: Next?
(cute guy doesn't move)
QV: wait, is he cute or am i telling myself that because i really, REALLY want to go on a date already?
(steals another glance)
Second Deli Counter Guy: Next?
(cute guy still doesn't move)
QV: no he's cute. say something! say something dammit! eerrrr what if he's married. does he have a ring?
(tries inconspicuously to look at his hand)
QV: no ring. but what about a girlfriend? well the only way to find out is to SAY SOMETHING. he probably has one. he's wearing a yellow shirt AND he's cute.
Second Deli Counter Guy: Next?
(cute guy yet still doesn't move)
QV: (raises her hand and sort of points at the deli guy) um...do you...?
Cute Guy: I'm still thinking.
QV: oh ok. ok now say something else. SAY SOMETHING ELSE.
First Deli Counter Guy: here you go!
QV: thank you! (smiles broadly making sure to look at cute guy still wearing the smile as she turns around)
Queen Vee heads over to produce, defeated.
QV: well, at least you smiled. that's a first.
Fin.
5 comments:
thank you. thank you for making this blog. You have taken all the thoughts I've ever had and put them into words. I'm 25, single, never been on one single date. I've been waiting to start dating since the fifth grade, and its never happened for me. Sometimes I feel like I fail at life on just a very basic human level.I've never talked about this with anyone in real life. So many times I've wished that I had someone to talk to, like a support group, who would actually understand, but its almost as though our problem is so against nature that people simply cannot comprehend the idea of it being real. Please keep your blog up.
Dear Queen Vee,
I have been following your blog and have written anonymously a couple of times. Please keep going - things can only get better, and you should use each experience you have as a learning curve. Sometimes I find that pretending that I am someone else helps as well - then I think, what do I have to lose in this situation? Go with what your instinct tells you and don't let any self-doubt get in the way.
I'm saying all this (in an ideal world this would be what I would do), but in actual fact I am very much you, I am the same age as you and I am having the same troubles as you.
Do you have any email address/other form of contact (I do realise though that you may wish not to disclose this and that is fine) - it's just that I have been following your blog and would very much like to talk
oh yes! it was on my old formatted page but when i changed it the address disappeared. you can reach me thequeenvee at gmail. i will put it on the main page again as well. talk to you soon!
That post has summarized many occasions for me when I am out and about. I will often see cute guys at the store and wonder if they are single, but nothing ever happens. All you can do is smile (which is easier said than done).
Story. of. my. life.
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